The feeling of loneliness doesn't depend on how many people you have around you. If you've ever been in a room full of people and still felt lonely you know what I'm talking about. The feeling of being lonely is there because you have abandoned yourself. The feeling of being lonely is a disconnection. From you, the Now and/or the people around you.
I have come to realize that I had become friends with the loneliness instead of becoming friend with myself. I have changed that now. But somedays my old friend the loneliness comes by and then I know what to do. And I want to share the steps with you here:
What does the feeling of loneliness want? Is it a protection, are you keeping your distance for a reason? Is it a sadness for not listening to yourself? Have you lost yourself in what you think others expect from you? Are you really alone? What is it that makes you feel alone? Has the loneliness become your friend?
Make time for you and do what you love to do, or just hang out. If you love long conversations with your best friend, do that with yourself by writing. take car of yourself and treat yourself as your best friend.
Be yourself and do what you like to do and there is a higher possibility that you will find like minded. If you are trying to adjust to much to others then that is what you going to get. If you do what you like to do you will surely find others that like it as well.
To let new people or experiences in, you need to make space for them. We all have the same amount of time on our hands so it is important to use them on things that gives us energy. What are you willing to let go of?
I meet a girl who wanted to have more friends and network more. So I started to invite her to the networking events I was going to but she was not so interested. I meet her when I was out on dinner with one of my networks and asked her to join us. She did, and the first thing she said when I introduced her was that it was so hard to find friends and good networks in that town. She disconnected from us immediately. She told us her truth and that made it our truth as well. I understand that all networks aren’t for everyone but the important thing to remember is to be open for the opportunity that you might actually meet someone unexpected. You never know where you might meet your next best friend or a business partner or the love of your life. Think about what you want and open up for the possibility that it is possible and you never know where you might meet them.
The solution of loneliness is connection. You need to connect, not withdraw. Start with the connection with yourself. Give yourself a really long hug, you are your own best friend.
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