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What is Self coaching?

Self Coaching is a technique to lead yourself to success. Leading yourself means you are aware of your feelings, thoughts and behaviours. A conscious awareness about yourself means that you can quickly choose how to react and act in a situation.

Coaching is a qualified communication that helps you find the answer to the questions; Who are you? What do you want? How will you get there?

The reason that coaching has been so successful and why it delivers such high results is because when someone else asks you questions, it kick starts new thoughts within you and you find the answers that are true to you. Another reason that coaching works so well is that an external coach doesn’t put any values or judgments on who you are, what you want, what you have experienced in your life or what you feel and think. A coach asks questions because they are interested in knowing where you are right now to make a plan, so you as the client take steps forward. To be able to coach yourself you...

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How are you?

"How are you?" is a question we get quite often. How do you feel about that question? Do you answer? Do you answer "good" or do you answer truthfully? What would be a truthful answer for you? Why do we even ask the question when clearly so many do not want to hear the real answer? Because it is polite? Honestly though, how polite is it to ask a question that we don't want the answer to? What would happen if we only asked the question when we are prepared to hear the real answer and to see the other person where he or she is right now without judgement? What would happen if we actually took the question seriously when someone asked us and told them how it was?

It's mental health awareness week here in New Zealand and I think that one key to better mental health is to listen, communicate and connect. Listen to ourselves, our body, our inner voice and communicate our wants and needs. Connect with ourselves and the people around us. See us as the human beings we are and not some...

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What kind of mum do you want to be?

What kind of mum do you want to be?

“- When I become a mum, I will never bribe my kids with candy or food.” Yes, I actually did say this before I had kids. Bahahaha.

It is so easy to have an opinion about what we don’t know. Especially when it comes to parenthood or motherhood. That’s because we have all had some kind of experience of a  mother figure and we all have an opinion of what works and what doesn’t. Most of all, we know what we will do better than our parents, and what they did really well. It is not until we become parents ourselves that we really understand the struggles as a parent.

 

Sometimes I open my mouth and my mother comes out...

More than a couple of times I’ve heard my mum’s voice coming out of my mouth. Not literally, but when I am telling the kids something that my mum told me when I was young. Saying things that I haven’t really thought about. There is so much information on how to be a good mum, you...

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Would you like more freedom?

Would you like more freedom?

I hear a lot of my clients wanting more freedom and I know I longed for it as well. But in reality, we are not imprisoned so the freedom is right here. Freedom is nothing that we need to reach or work for. Freedom is something we have already, we just have to realise it.

What is making you feel that you don’t have any freedom? You! Your thoughts, the feeling that you have to adjust or make yourself smaller. You put yourself in a box where you think you should be or where you think that other people want you. And the price you pay is your freedom. But do you know what? The freedom is right here and all you have to do, to have the freedom you want, is to claim it.

You are free to do whatever you want (except breaking the laws)

With the freedom, you also have the freedom to choose. You can choose to go or you can choose to stay. You can choose to rescue someone else or you can choose to not stepping into their drama. You can choose to stay small or...

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Sweden vs New Zealand

Today, the 6:th of June is the Swedish national day. Happy Birthday, Sweden!  
I thought I'd take the opportunity to share some of the differences I've observed between Sweden and New Zealand since we moved here almost two years ago. 

 

Let’s talk about the weather! 

Yes, both Swedes and Kiwis talk a lot about the weather, only in New Zealand we have, what we call April weather in Sweden, all year around. That is all: the four seasons weather on the same day. And longer summers, at least here in Raglan.

 

Seasons

The seasons change by the calendar here in New Zealand and in Sweden, it’s by the temperature. 

 

Opposites

- Sweden is on the opposite side of the globe. 

- When it's winter here it's summer there. 

- When it's night here, it's day there. The time difference is 10 hours now and when Sweden goes into wintertime and New Zealand goes into summertime there is a 12 hours time difference.

- We drive on the opposite side of...

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What would happen if you were more egoistic?

What would happen if you were a bit more ego? Would you stop caring so much what other people were doing or thinking? Would you do your own thing? Would you follow what you thought was fun and that you had a talent for? Would you stop being envious of the people doing what you deep down really would like to fo but don't acknowledge to yourself? Would you take better care of yourself? Would you bring forward your gifts for others to enjoy?


I believe so! I believe that the world would be so much better if we all were a bit more egoistic, putting ourselves first. Doing what makes us happy because that's going to spread. Use your ego, use your driving forces. There is a lot of energy there and your tool here on earth. Are you scared to let some aspects out? That is because you haven't allowed it to come out in the right place. It hasn't been connected to your life intentions or your purpose. 

I think that the ego has, undeservingly, got a really bad reputation. We blame the ego...

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What do you believe in?

Belief = a psychological state in which an individual holds a proposition or premise to be true

I find the word 'Believe' really interesting. Sometimes we get the impression that we have to know something to be true in order to believe them. But we can actually choose what we want to believe in and explore that. Right now I am choosing to explore what to believe in, just because it makes my life more interesting. What do you like to explore? What would make your life a bit more interesting if you believed in it?

Honestly, we do not have to take life so seriously, let’s play!

 

Hit reply and tell me what you would like to explore or believe in to make your life more interesting!

 
With Dreams, Love, and Adventure,

Frida Kabo

 

When nothing is certain, anything is possible

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Create the routines that supports you

Today is the first day of the new school year for my boys here in Raglan. We’ve had a wonderful summer break and now it’s wonderful to have the kids back in school and get back to the routines. The brain likes routines and habits because it takes less energy than to do something new. Therefore it is important to look at our habits and routines so that they support us in the way we want to. 

Do your routines support you?

Now is the perfect time to think it through. What is the first thing you do in the morning? Is that what you would like to do? How does it support you? Go through your habits and routines and ask these questions to be more conscious about the support you have built or not built for yourself. 

 
What support would you like to have?

If you feel that you don’t have the routines to support you. Think about what support you would like to have. What do you want more of in your life?


Example of routines could be:


- Think a happy thought...

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Different views on depression

What is depression or anxiety to you? Where is the line between normal and not normal? When is it time to get help?

The other week I looked at a very interesting documentary called ‘Sunny side of spirit’. It’s about the view on depression and mental “illness” in different countries. Coming from Sweden and living in New Zealand where both countries have a high rate of suicides and depression challenges, and also from my own experience with depression. This is really a subject that interest me. The documentary follows the Dutch woman Sunny to Accra in Ghana, Taipei in Taiwan and Salvador in Brazil. To see how the different countries view upon and handel depression compared to ‘the western world’. 

What strikes me is how hard we try to put everyone into the box of what is normal. I recognise it from my own upbringing and on the reactions of Sunny who leads the documentary. 

Five things that really resonated with me is: 

1....

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What's on you mind?

What's on your mind?

Facebook ask us this every time we logg in, but have you really taken the time to think about it?

We have approximately 80,000 thoughts per day. Studies have shown that 95% of these thoughts are the same as those we had yesterday, and those that we will have tomorrow.  Imagine that, 95% of our thoughts are the same! Our brain is lazy it wants to do the same thing over and over again because it takes more energy to create new connections than to use the old ones. 

Our thoughts create our reality so what we think about is really important if we want to change something. To change the thoughts you need to become aware of them and consciously explore them. In this way you can discover thought patterns and connections that could be hard to discover otherwise. One way of doing this is by writing your thoughts down or having someone to help you see your thoughts, like a coach.

I do a writing process every morning and I would like to share it...

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